Wednesday, March 29, 2006

 

Fortune Cookies

FORTUNE COOKIE ETIQUETTE
1. In order for a fortune to come true, you must actually eat the cookie.
2. A fortune cookie that does not contain a fortune is bad luck (like you are marked for death or something)
3. Real fortune cookies should have actual "fortunes" - no character assessments or happy thoughts.
4. If there are a pile of fortune cookies, either pick first or let everyone else take one and take what's left. This gives FATE the best chance of getting you "YOUR" correct fortune.

MY FORTUNE FROM RANDOM CHINESE FOOD TONIGHT
"Hilltop and seaside resorts are where you'll live for life."
Now that is what I call a fortune.

FAVORITE FORTUNE COOKIE RELATED STORY
In my old apartment, I was washing dishes one night when Hooch walked up to me and sat down. I looked down at him and realized he had a piece of paper stuck in his jowls. I pulled it out and it was a fortune reading "You will be deeply loved." When I looked back down at him, his top lip was stuck and I swear it looked like he was smiling. After a big smile and a hearty chuckle, I called him "FortunePuppy" for a week (o.k. - sometimes I called him Hong Kong Phooey, too)

WHAT THE HELL PROMPTED THIS?
Work today was busy (Community Sports Journal Club this AM, grand rounds, 2 operative cases, meetings) and I didn't get enough sleep last night. Also a bit emotionally drained. My mom is in town visiting. I picked her up at my Aunt's after work and said, "We are going out to dinner. I don't want to cook. I don't want to do dishes. I don't want to watch or listen to you do either. I want to go somewhere and sit in a booth. I want someone to take my order and bring me my food. I don't want to order at the counter. I don't want my number or my name called. And I want to go somewhere with parking." Wow, "I" am a pushy, demanding bitch. But I got what I wanted - red vinyl booth, old fashioned americanized chinese food including deep fried egg rolls, an off-street parking lot, and inspiration.

Comments:
The Chinese buffets here have bbq chicken wings. It cracks me up.

Here's to relaxing meals with plenty of grease!
 
What does it mean when you get not ONE but TWO fortunes in the same cookie?
 
Two fortunes has always been the equivalent of cheating at solitaire. I change the rules in my favor, i.e., I pick the better fortune. If they're both good, I figure I deserve them both.
 
My favorite fortune was this - "Do not smell the inside of a hat."

How can you go wrong with advice like that?

BTW, I agree wholeheartedly with your fortune cookie fortune reading method.
 
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